Women Jokes part 2

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Unusual Tattoos

A woman goes into a tattoo parlor and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh, right up just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put "Happy Thanksgiving" under the turkey. So the guy does it and it comes out looking real good.
The woman then instructs him to put a Santa Clause with "Merry Christmas" up on her left thigh. So the guy does it and it comes out looking good too.
As the woman is getting dressed to leave, the tattoo artist says, "If you don't mind, could you tell me why you had me put such unusual tattoos on your thighs?"
She said, "I'm sick and tired of my husband complaining all the time that there's nothing good to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas."

Discussing Boyfriends

A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends.
Brunette: "Last night I had three orgasms in a row!"
Blonde: "That's nothing; last night I had over a hundred."
Brunette: "My god! I had no idea he was that good."
Blonde: (looking shocked) "Oh, you mean with one guy?"

Swimming Prohibited

A good looking woman walked into an orchard and found a lovely pool in it, and decided to go skinny-dipping. She looked around, didn't see anyone, and undressed.
Naked and just as she was about to dive in, the orchard grower appeared from behind the bush where he was hiding all along and told her that swimming was prohibited.
"You could have told me that before I undressed!" she scolded him.
He replied, "Hey! Only swimming is prohibited, undressing isn't..."

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