What was your wife's maiden name?

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My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other -- so now it's just a waiting game.

John: I didn't sleep with my wife before we were married. Did you?
Bob: I'm not sure. What was your wife's maiden name?

Marriage is spending the rest of you life with someone
you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them.

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

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